What No One Tells You About Trying to Conceive: Erica’s Fertility Journey
If you’re new here, welcome! We’re Hillary and Erica, co-hosts of the Early-Momming Podcast. Hillary is a labor and delivery nurse, lactation consultant, and mom of four. Erica is our detail-oriented, Type A co-host who brings a fresh perspective. This week, she’s sharing her deeply personal fertility journey.
For many women, the road to motherhood doesn’t start with a positive pregnancy test. It starts with uncertainty, frustration, and the emotional rollercoaster of trying to conceive (TTC). In this post, we pull back the curtain on Erica’s TTC journey: the apps, the tests, the disappointments, and finally—hope.
Trying to Conceive: The Planning Phase
When Erica and her husband Nate decided it was time to start a family, they were intentional. They waited until the timing felt right—post-wedding, post-long-distance relationship, and when life finally felt settled.
Like so many women, Erica thought that deciding to start trying would be the hardest part. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t.
Armed with ovulation tracking apps like Flow, test strips, and prenatal vitamins, Erica dove into the process with a detailed plan. She even scheduled it out by season to avoid being too pregnant in the Arizona summer.
The First Positive
Erica got her first positive pregnancy test in March 2024—just one cycle after they began trying. She surprised Nate, felt the rush of joy and hope… and then, five days later, started her period.
It was likely a chemical pregnancy. But regardless of the medical term, the emotional impact was heavy. The joy of possibility had already taken root.
The Second Loss
A few months later, Erica got another positive test. This time, she and Nate were more guarded. She tested daily to watch the line darken. When it started fading, she held onto hope.
Then, on a flight to Texas, she started bleeding.
She still showed up and recorded a podcast episode that night—one of many examples of the silent grief women carry while trying to carry a child.
The Loneliness of TTC
After two early losses, Erica realized how isolating the TTC journey can be. She was doing everything “right,” but had no control. Even Nate, as loving and supportive as he was, couldn’t fully understand.
One moment that stood out was when a coworker simply asked, “Can I pray for you?” That question was the most meaningful support she received. No advice. No toxic positivity. Just presence.
Medical Help and No Clear Answers
By early 2025, after 12 cycles, Erica and Nate began working with a reproductive endocrinologist. They went through diagnostic testing—blood work, ultrasounds, and a sperm analysis.
Everything looked “normal.”
That was both a relief and a frustration. No diagnosis meant no clear solution. Erica wanted a problem to solve—a fix. But reproductive health doesn’t work that way.
The Third Positive
In January 2025, Erica got a third positive test. But this time, the line faded within a day. Another heartbreak. More grief. More questions. Still, no clear reason why.
Fertility, Faith, and Financial Questions
As Erica and Nate considered their next steps, including the possibility of IVF, they faced questions they never thought they’d have to ask:
How far are we willing to go?
How much are we willing to spend?
And the biggest question: Will this ever work?
The Fourth Time
They didn’t take a break that month. And they’re so glad they didn’t.
In early March 2025, Erica got another positive test. This time, the HCG numbers looked promising. The lines darkened. They monitored everything. Slowly, cautiously, they began to believe.
At the 9-week ultrasound, they saw a heartbeat. Measurements matched the due date. Then the NIPT came back with good results.
Erica is now in her second trimester. Due in November. Exactly when she hoped she would be, back in February 2024.
What to Say (And Not Say) to a Friend Experiencing Loss
Erica shared an important takeaway: if someone opens up to you about fertility struggles or loss, recognize that you’re on sacred ground. Hold space. Don’t try to fix it.
And maybe, just ask: “Can I pray for you?”
Erica’s Message to You
If you’re in the middle of your own TTC journey, Erica wants you to know this:
“Your journey is your own. The timeline will look different. Your feelings are valid. You are not alone.”
Whether you’re tracking ovulation, grieving a loss, or just beginning to consider motherhood, we hope Erica’s story helps you feel seen.
Want more honest conversations like this?
Listen to the full episode of the Early-Momming Podcast, Season 2, Episode 11: “Erica’s Fertility Update.”
And if you’re navigating early motherhood (or trying to get there), come hang out with us. We’re in your corner.
So go ahead and hit play on Episode 11, Season 2 of the Early-Momming Podcast. And if you love it?
Please, please leave a review. The show won’t keep growing without you.
Expert Insights Delivered to Your Inbox
Hey, I’m Hillary. As a labor & delivery nurse, feeding specialist, and a mom of four, I have a lot of friends
It’s funny. I may not hear from someone for actual decades, and then, when they hit about their third trimester, the texts start rolling in.
Honestly, I’m glad to be there for them; few moms have a qualified (and non-judgy!) friend in their corner.
I’d like to be in your corner, too.
